65 years ago today…My parents were married. Fifteen years ago this week (9/8), we threw a great big party for them with about 100 family and friends to celebrate their 50th anniversary.
Today is bittersweet. I don’t remember last years’ date being as sad as today. Maybe because my dad has fallen so ill twice in the past month and doesn’t appear to be recovering with the strength and fight he seemed to have in him for so long.
Today, he remembered as we knew he would. I brought him a blanket that was given to them for their 50th by my cousins (Chris & Lou) that was personalized and embroidered for that big day. The only good it was doing here was a place for Sassy the cat to leave her mark and her hair. Tonight, it is at the foot of my dad’s bed.
He seemingly isn’t too social these days or want much company – maybe just ‘us’. His voice is even more raspy which is likely the PD. There are a lot of changes going on at the VA Home, including staffing, room swaps, people moving and all too often, people dying. Expected or not, frequent or not, it does seem to upset everyone each and every time; knowing that they’re most likely not going to ever leave there; knowing that they will die there or at the closest hospital. Sometimes, it’s too much to think about.
In any case, my parents had a very loving relationship in which we could all only hope for. As much as they could, they did EVERYTHING together. Two peas in a pod – or “side by each” as my dad had always said. That that is how they will be buried – side by each.
The other night on the phone, my dad said he wished his heart would just stop. But tonight, all his vitals are good. His heart is broken though as his mind continues to be strong enough to remember and to feel the loss. As I’ve spent some part of nearly every anniversary they had with them, I had to be there for my dad today as well. Certainly not the same. None of us are.